I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
