Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize