Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
