so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize