just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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