We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
