you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
