My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
