Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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