People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
You were trust falling into bushes
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
