Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
