"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
