John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
