no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
