i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Randomize
