Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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