Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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