he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
