Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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