so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Randomize
