Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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