I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
