You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize