i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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