3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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