Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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