Sponge bath it is.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
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