I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I need help removing her.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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