He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
