just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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