remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
