i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
