Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
COCAINE IS GR8
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
