Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
organizing the empties. That sober.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
