so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
