dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Randomize
