I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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