i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
