I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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