I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize