god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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