So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
