You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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