just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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