dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
