What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
