everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Im just a social blackout drinker.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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