I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
