sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
