Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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